you can trust me, trust nobody.

We're only taking turns
Holding this world
It's how it's always been
When you're older you will understand

If I say who I know it just goes to show
You need me less than I need you
But take it from me we don't give sympathy
You can trust me trust nobody
But I said you and me we don't have honesty
The things we don't want to speak
I'll try to get out but I never will
This traffic is perfectly still

We're only taking turns
Holding this world
It's how it's always been
When you're older you will understand

And then again maybe you don't
And then again maybe you won't

When you're older you might understand.

thumbs down.

i can't believe the effects that stress can have on your body.
you don't have to eat.
you don't have to sleep.
you're constantly distracted.
your body feels like you got ran over by a semi, but not because of anything physical..just from emotions.
you can be fine one second and a complete mess the next.

it really is taking a tole on me.

revision.

WHAT THE FUCK.
my life is a joke.

why do i have to care so much.

help.

if you lose hope, you lose everything. and i'm trying so hard not to unravel.

i care too much.

i have a habit of driving myself crazy. i do it to myself, i'm aware that i do it and i absolutely hate it, but for some reason that hasn't stopped me from continuing to do so.
and i hate being sensitive, even though i try not to be. [that actually probably makes it worse.]
it's hard for me to open up to someone and when i do, i let things that shouldn't really matter get to me too easily. that's the main reason why i don't.
i hate misinterpreting things. i hate assuming..even though i've tried really hard to stop doing so, it still happens every once in a while. i hate having to guess.

things will get better because they have to.

life..

i'm on the fence whether or not to move forward or just stay where i am.
it's a weird feeling..like i'm torn in half and i want things that are on both sides but i can't have that, i have to choose one.
theres things happening around me that i'd like to be a part of, and i feel like at this point in my life, i SHOULD be a part of. but with my current situation it just isn't going to work.
i wish someone could just tell me what's going to happen or what to do because having to guess is just wearing me down.
i need something to change soon and all i can do is try to make it happen because sitting back and letting fate run it's course hasn't gotten me very far.

story of my life.

two steps forward, three steps back.never seems to fail.

this kindof thing just makes me want to go back to the way i was. not trusting anyone again, it's so much safer.