Time to grow up!

TIME TO GET MY SHIT TOGETHER (and stop just talking about it.)

Ready.

I've come to a point in my life where I'm ready to take the next step into adulthood. Although I feel like I've come really far in the past few years, (managing money, being completely independent from anyone and succeeding at it, being self sufficent and working full time), I feel like there is one area that I may have skipped over or ignored..maybe unconciously, but nevertheless I've realized that I've come to the breaking point with it and I can choose to go one of two ways: step up and deal with it, or continue to ignore it. I'm choosing to deal with it and make some changes.The step that I seem to keep ignoring is being able to control my emotions. For the most part, I think I'm fine. But I know myself well enough to admit that there are times where I need to chill out. Life is not meant to be spent worrying. As I started to post this, I saw the last post I made...nearly a year ago...and it was about anxiety and stress and how I wasn't able to control it. That just makes me want to put this effort into effect even sooner. I don't want to look back in another year and feel the same as I do now.I need to relax more, stop stressing or worrying about things that aren't even valid. I realize it's a habit that I have carried with me for YEARS, and it's not going to go away overnight, but from this point forward I promise that I will be more aware of it, and that I will not allow it to take over my common sense.I am very lucky, and I know it. I have a good job for now, a great new apartment, and a wonderful man that makes my day every single day. He may not be perfect, but he is perfect for me. And I want to be that for him as well.And because of that, there's no need for me to have any kind of pessimistic attitude that I've noticed a little bit lately. So I'm done with it, because he means that much. No more insecurities, no more jealousy, worrying over nothing, assuming, anger, anxious or being sad for no reason.It doesn't happen often, but it happens enough. I'm putting an end to it now. Time to get back to being me, and not this fragile person I've become. Starting now.

Again.

I wish there was just a simple way to make myself feel better when I get into these funks...but nothing's ever simple. It doesn't happen as much as it used to, so I guess it just takes time..and I'm just tired of waiting.
I've spent too much of my life worrying about what MIGHT happen and how I can't control it, but that's just the thing that could save me...that I really don't have control over anything but myself, so why worry? I don't want to look back on my life 10 or 20 years from now and regret that I didn't live it to the fullest. What could make me relax and let it go? I have no idea, or I already would've done it.
Anxiety is one of the worst things that's ever happened to me, and while I hate it more than anything, it gives me insight to what I need to change and what's not good for me. Maybe in a year I'll look back on this and finally be free from it. I'm definitely moving in the right direction, there's just a lot of speed bumps in the way.
Anything good is never easy.
Goodnight.

Confidence is key.

Just remember how great it is. Don't sweat the small stuff.
No regrets, no looking back. Only forward and you can't go wrong.
Love. <3

WWW..

He is amazing. :)
He is my perfect.
<3

feeling refreshed :)

[Stop trying to figure out where you're going, just enjoy where you're at.]

letting go of anything and everything that was holding me back.
feels great.

fresh start.

one of the traits i'm most proud of is that i can make a promise to myself and without any doubt, know that i will keep it.
i promise, that i will only move forward from here. not focus on the past, not question any previous actions or statements.
the past is the past for a reason. i will not let it affect me or be a part of my life. that includes people from the past also, i will not allow you to be a part of my life. i will not waste my time on you ever again.
the people in my life now are here for a reason, all picked by me and i intend to keep them here.

if i was someone who focused on the past all the time, i wouldn't be me. i wouldn't be growing and learning new things every day. i wouldn't be becoming the person i want to be.

i will love without restraint. i will give my all and never have regrets. unconditionally and without boundries.

Love is patient, love is kind, love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

<3