Well, it's the first day of the new year...and I can say that I honestly never guessed I'd be here, in the position I'm in today. But I guess that's life right? You never know what's going to happen..
I know I'm strong and that I can get through this, but my mind has a way of always trying to talk me out of it..I'm working on that, mainly bc I trust my heart more than my mind. And at least that's something I know will never change.
I'm getting back to the old me, not bc I don't like the new me, but bc that's really the only option I have at the moment. But there are some new things I'm taking with me on this journey..
I never want anyone or anything to make me a bitter, less trusting, less loving person. There will always be hard times in life, but I'm not going to let that change who I have become. I don't want to put up walls again, it took so long for them to come down the first time, I'm just leaving them alone and not wasting time on building them up again. I love to love. I trust my heart and know that things are going to work out, one way or another. I will not let this break me, or ruin me, or turn me into something I'm not. I will not be an angry, cold hearted, hopeless person. I will continue to have faith in love, loyalty, and kindness. I will not become a victim of heartbreak, even though I know all too well how easy that can be...bc it is the worst feeling I have ever had to feel. And I will never wish that on anyone, or never make anyone feel from me. It's time to love myself, because I've never really gotten the chance to, and when it is time, I will be able to love more than anyone expected.
I will try my hardest to turn this into a positive thing, and never stop listening to my heart. No matter what.
<3
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